Tuesday , 28 May 2024
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Happiness – Choice or Circumstances?

happiness-inside job“Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be!” 

Abraham Lincoln

An elusive state of mind, yet the most sought after by each of the living mortals, happiness is something everyone yearns for. Sadly enough, only a few with the right perspectives in life manage to feel the real contentment that comes from being truly happy.

So, is happiness merely a result of your circumstances or can you actually make a conscious choice to be happy in life? The very fact that your circumstances are often beyond your control tells you that you cannot depend on them for your joy in life. Whether in sunny or in rainy days, being happy is a conscious, righteous and a very personal choice you can make.

Questions to ask

Before I set out to show how exactly to be happy is a choice you can make, just ask yourself a few crucial questions as below:

So when exactly do you say you are ‘happy’?

  • When you have the right circumstances?
  • When you have all that you want?
  • When you are doing what you really want to do in life?
  • When you are healthy, have money and/or have a family?

Well, the list could just go on! For all of us who always thought happiness is something that comes to us when all is well in our lives, its perhaps time to think again. Check out the 5 key facts which redefine the very concept of being happy in life.


1. It’s an attitude  

Staying happy with yourself and your surroundings basically comes from the right attitude. Being happy comes from an ability to see positives in life (even when you are going through a hard day or negative events). Some might call it being optimistic, but it’s not just being blindly hopeful all the times. Instead, true happiness lies in realizing from within that there is always a brighter side to every situation. All you need to do is practice to see that side and choose to be happy whatever might happen.

2. It can be learnt with practice

Against what is generally believed, being happy and an optimist is something you can learn by practice. Once you’ve realized that it’s in your hands to be truly satiated, just keep a conscious check on your negative thoughts. Keep company of positive people and read good books. You can even post small notes in your work area or living room reminding you to abstain from negative and unhappy thoughts. I understand you can’t completely block negativity in your life, but try to pay attention to your reaction to it. You know the famous worry pic. If you have a solution that there’s nothing to worry about. If you don’t, then worry won’t fix anything 🙂


3. All you need is the will power

If you settle for nothing less, you will surely achieve it! With the right will power and the belief that you can remain happy if you really want to, nothing is impossible. Learn to look at the brighter side of life, have enough patience and believe that the world is an amazing place. Remember, you can do anything you set your mind to.

4. Keep your priorities and perspectives clear

A cluttered mind and unfocussed lifestyle are the breeding ground for frustration and self-doubt. Know what you want from life, set clear goals and priorities and attempt to achieve them in a targeted and focused manner.

5. Let go of things you can’t control

In spite of our best of intentions and efforts, we can only manage to predict and control the circumstances in our lives to a certain extent. Sometimes, the things that get us frustrated the most, are the things we have no control over. We get stuck in traffic. The weather turns bad… Remember the main principle of law of attraction – whatever you focus on, it will grow. If you focus on what you can’t control, the things in your life you can’t control will seem to increase. If you focus on what you can control, then your worries will shrink and your power will grow.

At the end of it all, just remember happiness is a choice, not a result. Nothing will make you happy until you choose to be happy.



About Oksana

Oksana Ostrovsky is a founder of LoveSense and an author of "Find Love By Finding Yourself" book. Over the past five years, Oksana has had the privilege of helping hundreds of singles and couples open themselves up to experience of more love, joy and fulfillment in their lives. She is a life-long student of human psychology, relationship dynamics, feng shui and other modalities of health and healing.

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One comment

  1. Happiness is hard work. This article is 100% true in my opinion. Mind set, positive outlook and input, acceptance, willingness and determination is a must! It take practice to retrain your mind to become truly happy. I know I struggle with allowing people or situations dictate my happiness but I’m working on it.

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